FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
The role of a lifetime
Jessica Ruano to play Nadine’s Thornhill’s clitoris in the Spoken Word Plot
Ottawa, April 6, 2010: Most female performers dream of playing Desdemona or Hedda Gabler or Blanche Dubois. But local arts enthusiast Jessica Ruano has much higher aspirations. Since meeting local playwright/actor Nadine Thornhill over four years ago, Jessica has yearned to play the role of Nadine’s clitoris. As astonishing as it may seem, Jessica will have that opportunity on Sunday, April 11, 2010 when she and Nadine perform as headliners at the Spoken Word Plot in JR’s Downstairs Pub, 385 Ottawa Street in Almonte, Ontario.
“It’s a dream come true” says Jessica, between tears. “I performed the coochie-snorcher piece in the Vagina Monologues back in second year university, but this… this is the role of a life time. I feel like my years of clitoral experience are finally paying off.”
The poem, Clitoral Protestation, was originally written and performed as a solo piece by Nadine for a local erotica series called Talented Tongues. However, after having seen Jessica perform at other poetry events in Ottawa, Nadine realized that the role was ideal for this cunning linguist.
“The subtlety of Jessica’s performance style is just right for playing the clitoris,” explains Nadine. “In order to do the role justice, the performer should have certain sensitivity in regards to the female body, and know how to push all the right buttons.“
Jessica Ruano and Nadine Thornhill perform a collaborative set of their own poems and storytelling pieces and haikus at the Spoken Word Plot this Sunday in Almonte. For more information, please follow this link to view the official press release.

Amusing Facebook exchange:
Ron Deschenes
Very sensitive subject matter – hope it doesn’t rub anyone the wrong way. I’m sure your oral performance will leave everyone with their lips agape; you are, after all, one of the most cunning linguists in the country. I’m sure your performance will make the audience’s heart ache – literally!
Jessica Ruano
Thanks, Ronnie. Really. I’ll let you write my press release next time.
Ruthanne Edward
Augh, and I am going to miss it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’ll make Rusty take the video camera so I can still revel in your clitoral magnificence. I think the Kymeras are featuring in June. I don’t know how we could possibly top this.
Wayne Current
woot
Kel Morin-Parsons
I . . . I have no idea what to say . . .
Jessica Ruano
Aren’t you sorry you’re not coming, Kel?
Kel Morin-Parsons
And if you think this old maid is touching THAT one with a barge pole, darling . . .
John Doucet
Barge Pole? Hmmmmmm….
Jessica Ruano
Sounds sexy.
Sean O’Gorman
barge Pole’s are sexy, but you have to be holding them the right way, if not then they’re just intimidating.
Kel Morin-Parsons
CHILDREN! STOP! I COMMAND IT! *waves arms frantically in panicky-teacher mode* John Doucet, you’re staying after class.
John Doucet
Kel, will you stop it? Everything you suggest is oozing with innuendo.
Jessica Ruano
John, you’ve been a bad bad bad bad boy.
Justin Ashworth
fuck, I am there. *starts swimming*
Jessica Ruano
I’ll save you a seat, Justin!
Justin Ashworth
I wish I could swim.